Cats Got My Tongue

Me: “Hey. It’s time to get up.”

Ben: “Okay.”

Me: “You can do it. I believe in you.”

Ben: [doesn’t get up]

Me: [singing] “And we all say…”

Ben: “Stop it.”

Me: “Oh! Well! I never! Was there ever…”

Ben: “Stop it.”

Me: “… a cat so clever…”

Ben: “STOP IT.”

Me: “… as magical Mr. Benstoffelees?”

And then he literally smothered me with a pillow.

But he got up.

The parts of my brain that can stil function without oxygen are very proud of themselves.

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