Footwork

[A gay guy and a straight girl are hovering in the doorway of the shop.]

Gay Guy: “Do you sell shoes?”

Me: “No.”

Gay Guy: “Oh. Okay.”

Straight Girl: “What about flip-flops? Do you sell flip-flops?”

Me: “No.”

Straight Girl: “You sell socks, though.”

Me: “Yes.”

Straight Girl: “But you don’t sell shoes?”

Me: “No.”

Straight Girl: [accusingly]But you sell socks.

Gay Guy: [to her] “God, you’re stupid.” [then, to me] “She’s stupid. I’m sorry. We’re leaving.”

You know, other than his use of the word “stupid,” there really wasn’t anything to apologize for. Although if someone comes in all, “Oh, you sell video head cleaners but not VCRs?” I will burn this whole place to the ground.

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