Customer: “Do you sell single-use packets of lube?”

Me: “We don’t, but I do have free samples, if you’d like some.”

Customer: “I only need one.”

Me: “Okay. Well, here you go.” [I hand him a packet.]

Customer: “Thanks! It hurts.”

Me: “It… hurts?”

Customer: “Yeah. I bought a toy at this other shop…”

Me: “Oh.”

[beat]

Me: “Oh.”

Customer: “Yeah. They didn’t have any lube, but I went ahead and… listen, could I use your dressing room?”

Me: “With my blessing.”

He came out a couple of minutes later all, “Whew. Much better!” And then he smiled at me and left.

I tried to smile back, but, y’know. It hurts.