Ben: “Guacamoldie Hawn.”
Me: “Is that your Sisters name?”
Ben: “It was the daily special at a pizzeria in Brooklyn. It accompanied the Death Becrumbs Her.”
Me: “Wow. It’s like my brain opened a restaurant. We should totally get to eat there for free because of that.”
Ben: “We should open something similar.”
Me: “I was thinking the same thing. Should it be kink-themed? Or just terribly gay?”
Ben: “Both. Not gonna lie, I have always wanted to run a café/bakery. And also a restaurant called Fried Stuff in a Sauce.”
Me: “I’ve always wanted to run a coffee shop called King’s Corner, named after the card game some friends and I used to play in college. We added a rule that you could say whatever you wanted to the other players without repercussion. We worked out a lot of resentments that way.”
Ben: “Yes! Can we? Let’s do that.”
Me: “You bet. there will be little game tables and nooks and what-not, and then a back room for the more… flavorful games of chance.”
Ben: “Ooh! Good idea. Coffee. Baked goods. Maybe some sandwiches?”
Me: “Yes. Noshy things. Definitely scones. and a St. Andrew’s Croissant. And Spencer Spanking Plancakes.”
Ben: “Stop.”
Me: “I am so proud of the pancake name, I can’t even see straight.”
Ben: “I’ll make a cheese, bacon and tomato sandwich and call it the CBT. Or a bacon, egg, lettuce and tomato.”
Me: “Daddy’s BeLT?”
Ben: “Yup!”
Me: “We are frighteningly good at this.”
Ben: “Well, duh.”
Me: “And for Sunday brunch, Lonely Top Mimosas… because they’re bottomless.”
Ben: “Sold. And Beat Me Bloody Marys.”
Me: “10/10 Fuck yes. And melted white cheese with black beans and red bell peppers over blue corn tortillas. Leather Pride Flameado.”
Ben: “Nacho Pride Flag.”
Me: “Yesssss.”
Ben: “I want to figure out the perfect aftercare cake slice…”
Me: “Oh, shit. I’m about to drop the mic. Brace yourself.”
Ben: “…”
Me: “Whenever somebody orders a specialty coffee drink, we’ll ask them if they’d like it plain, or Drew Kramer.”
Ben: “What’s Drew Kramer?”
Me: “Topped with whip.”
Ben: “DONE. OVER AND OUT. WRAP IT UP AND MOVE IT ALONG. NO MORE TO SEE HERE.”
And then I was like, “I honestly don’t know if I’m shivering over this menu, or because I forgot to eat lunch,” and Ben was like, “Uh, go eat, dude,” which was quick thinking on his part. I mean, you can’t win James Beard and/or Pantheon of Leather Awards on an empty stomach. That’s just basic gastronomy.
Marjorie's Forgeries 
I used to play a game like this with a coworker. It feels like it was ages ago
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A breakfast sandwich called a Begg MacMuffin.
…and poppovers.
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Poppovers wins the Internet.
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I want to eat at your café. You had me at Saint Andrews Croissant.
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