Or maybe he’s just the worst undercover ICE agent ever. That would explain a lot.

Customer: “So, what do you have that’s popular [air quotes] ‘South of the Border’?”

Me: “Pardon?”

Customer: “What’s popular [wink] ‘South of the Border?'”

Me: “Uh…”

Customer: “You know… [eyebrow waggles] ‘South of the Border’?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I don’t understand what you’re asking.”

Customer: [disappointed] “Never mind.” [exit]

So what exactly was he looking for? Drugs? Dildos? Tex-Mex? Because I’ve got outstanding leads on all of the above, provided you tell me what the actual fuck it is you want.

Seriously, dude: own your addictions and speak your truth, and I won’t judge use your real name on the blog. Quid pro quo, amigo.

Author: Thumper (MJ)

Thumper Marjorie Forge is a Gardnerian High Priest, an initiate of the Minoan Brotherhood, a devout Discordian, a recovering alcoholic, and a notary public View all posts by Thumper (MJ)