Trigger Point of Impact

So this went down a couple of weeks ago:

Customer: [pointing at a can of Maximum Impact]: “What is that?”

Nuke: “Are you into fisting?”

Customer: “Um, no.”

Nuke: “Then you don’t need that.”

Nuke related this story to the rest of the Forge staff, and we all commended him on his quick wit, and secretly I was like, “I’ma totally steal this.”

And then this went down last night:

Customer: [pointing at a can of Maximum Impact]: “What is that?”

Me: [confidently] “Are you into fisting?”

Customer: “FISTING?!? EWWWW!!!”

Me: “Whoa, easy there…”

Customer: “WHY WOULD YOU EVEN ASK ME ABOUT FISTING?!?”

Me: “Well… people who are into fisting sometimes buy Max Impact…”

Customer: “PEOPLE ACTUALLY DO THAT?!?”

Me: “Uh… yeah… some people do…”

Customer: “WHY DO PEOPLE DO THAT?!?

Me: “I… um…”

Customer: “EWWWW!!!

Conclusion(s): I will never make fetch happen. It is also time to abandon my dream of becoming a crisis negotiator.

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