Customer 1: “You look good in that harness.”
Customer 2: “I do?”
Customer 1: “Oh, yeah. You should buy it.”
Customer 2: “Hmmm. I don’t know…”
Customer 1: “Do you want bear dick?”
Customer 2: “Well, yes, but…”
Customer 1: “Do you want bear dick?”
Customer 2: “Yes!”
Customer 1: “DO YOU?!”
Customer 2: “YES!”
Customer 1: “THEN BUY THE FUCKING HARNESS.”
Customer 2: “I’LL TAKE IT.”
Holy shit, you guys. I thought I was unbeatable at suggestive selling, but I bow to the new reigning champion.
Marjorie's Forgeries 
I love your blog, because you always provide me with the greatest phrases to confuse and appall my friends and loved ones. *cheerfully adds “Do you want bear dick?!” to the list*
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Let’s see. Bear Dick:
Rocks glass
1 oz George Dickel Tennessee Whiskey
1 oz Kaluha
1 oz Amaretto
Mix liqueurs in a cocktail shaker, pour over ice. Add 2-3 ounces of milk.
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This is SO Funny and witty. Definitely made my day!!!
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I’m glad you enjoyed it!
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Rereading it, I find it even funnier!!!!
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